Hello everybody I’m about to feed you the best cheese you’ll ever have! What do I mean with that? Well, there is a saying that is so cheesy that it’s difficult not to gag when you hear it. Truth is though, as cheesy as it sounds, it carries truth that will keep you through thick and thin.
“Couples who pray together stay together.”
One of my really good friends has told me that she and her husband, after years and years of struggle, after praying together each night, the whole relationship has changed. No, it actually was transformed! I've seen the transformation with my own eyes. Praying is not some sort of magical spell. Magical spells are real and do not just exist in Harry Potter! But prayer is not witchcraft. Prayer is inviting the God of the universe to intervene in our lives. He wants to be invited to fulfill his plans for us! He wants us to invite him into every area of our lives to see things through his eyes. He loves answering our selfless prayers of becoming a better husband, wife, friend, prayer warrior for others, a giver etc. Through lifting our voices to God, we are allowing him to lift his hand and reach down to us in every part of our lives.
It should be the most normal thing for us to do. A piece of fabric doesn’t try and run away from its maker. It will be a forever lonely piece of fabric instead of being what it was intended to become. Luckily pieces of fabric can’t run! But human beings, we (unfortunately) can. God gave his most valuable creation free will, arms and legs to do whatever we want. That does not mean that he does not want to be a part of everything in our lives. He wants to be our God! Guiding us and piecing together broken pieces and making beautiful stories with our lives. Our job is to allow it.
It’s quite the perfect mystery why God put man and woman together. It’s so perfectly designed that for me it became impossible not to believe in a creator just by looking at the human anatomy. I mean...Come on, just think about it! It’s also quite humerous since man and woman are so... different! But that’s a part of the point: God is so vast! He is so much that his character traits sometimes seem contradicting. But in fact they are not. A mother will know that out from a soft, loving, protective heart, she becomes fierce and dangerous and even “mean-looking” from the outside if someone tries to hurt her child. But taking a deeper look at it, you know that her heart is full of love. And that’s what I mean: There are so many sides to God that seem contrasting, but it’s all out a part of the infinite vastness of love, goodness, creativity, mercy, justice, beauty and wildness of who he is. Therefore, when the two very different genders come together - and stay together - it reflects God. It reflects his faithfulness, and also the beauty of the different sides of his perfect and sometimes confusing personality. Not confusing if you know him. But confusing from the outside. Think of the mother-picture again. And think of the trinity: God the Father, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. It's a perfect covenant. Friendship. Partnership. They are one, but with very different roles and personality traits.
There needs to be a deep and determined commitment for relationships to work. It can be too hard without the understanding of a covenant and the responsibility we have to reflect our creator in marriage. Also, if it is true that marriage was created for God himself to be reflected, and if it is true that God has an enemy, wouldn’t then the very thing God created to reflect himself be what is targeted the most by his enemy?
I believe so. And we see it all around. Unfaithfulness, addiction to porn that tears couples apart, divorce. The divorce statistics in church are no better than the outside the church. But couples who pray together...They do stay together. Not couples who say nice phrases and ends them with an amen. That’s not the prayers I am talking about. But couples who with a humble heart tells God they need his help and advice, and who lives a life of worship through being in constant communication with the Holy Spirit. It’s simple and lovely and true. And hard. It’s saying: Hello God! You know us better than we know ourselves, and we need your help. We're in need of you, Jesus daily! You saved us from eternal hell, now teach us your selfless ways revealed on the cross so we can show your unconditional love to each other daily!
It hasn’t been one day me and Huck haven't prayed together. We individually have time with God and pray throughout the day. Sometimes we have longer prayer sessions together, like if we’re driving places. And sometimes we just pray together before parting at night. Short or long, nevertheless, it’s prayer. And it’s choosing to let God and his will be the center. We are both letting God be more important than the other person. Sometimes Huck has to tell me: “Nova, that is not from God, I cannot agree with that.” And because I do not want to hurt God’s heart, I surrender. Huck wouldn’t be able to do and say these things unless he knew through our daily lifestyle of prayer that God is my greatest desire.
Praying together is also about focusing not on ourselves at all: It’s abot coming together to pray for others. Family, friends, celebreties, the people leading your country, people you don't like but need to receive God's heart for, and even countries! I don’t know why, but I am often reminded to pray for Russia! Not even a person! But God keeps putting russian people in my path that I can minister to because of it. It’s about setting aside time to care about what God cares about. And as we are giving of our time to care for what God cares for through prayer, it is also amazing to see how he himself cares for us and gives back for the time invested. Not that what we can receive back is the point at all, but it is a fact that he does give back. And when he does, it allows us to live blessed lives where we are in a place to bless others.
Start now. Create a habit that you can’t get out of. Us human beings have a tendency to create so many bad habits - bad habits that tear us apart from people we love. It's hard to stop bad habits, unless you're replacing them with new ones. So why not make a habit that will benefit our most valuable relationship to an extent that is literally supernatural? Create the habit of praying together. Every morning. Every night. And stay prayerful throughout the day in small and big things. “How can I bless my spouse today God? Please give me some creative way!” “How can I forgive this? Help me forgive and remind me of all you’ve forgiven me!” “Show me your heart in this situation because I am feeling confused”. God is faithful to answer these prayers. Wouldn’t you also be if you were God and your purpose for marriage was to reflect your own love?
This was a long one, you guys! But I believe it is a life changing one. Try it and watch what happens!
Much, much love, Nova